Day Four

I'm feeling proud of myself because today is Friday and I haven't seen my love since Monday and so far I've only sobbed uncontrollably three times been alright!

Yesterday I enjoyed a day with the family. We went down to the art museum to see a display of costumes worn by big name actors in relatively unknown movies. (Keira Knightly? Totally flatchested, just saying). The attention to detail was really awesome. My mom and sister being the seamstresses they are, buzzed over every tuck and pleat. Me? I fangirled over the incredible amounts of buttons, bows, and tulle. Which I love. Buttons. So many buttons. We stopped by two Jamba Juices and Krispy Kreme for treats.

So that was fun. Later I was invited out with friends, but all they could talk about was how "the beauty of women goes up 200% when you're on a mission," "That's why guys get married within three months of being home," and "So basically you're saying that a mission is prison!" I really didn't want to hear that kind of information, and so when they started to play an inappropriate game, I pulled a distressed-thirteen-year-old and called mommy to come get me. And then I cried went to bed.

You know, in the approximately seven months Ben and I have been dating, we haven't been apart longer than six days. I kid you not. Even when we were apart we still had goodnight and good morning texts to help make the time go by. So far, as things go, it's alright. Things are alright. Whenever it gets too scary or two overwhelming, I follow the counsel of Moroni to "pray with all the energy of heart," (Moroni 7:48) and the Lord hears me and brings a Spirit of Peace that doesn't necessarily make the pain go away but at least consoles me enough to help me make it through the next two hours. The only difficult part is that I feel so alone. Normally I would just call up my best friend and we would talk about it, and he would give me advice and tell me that everything is going to be okay, but now I feel like I can't even email him about it. None of my other friends really understand, and my family is sympathetic but getting sick of me. So I've got my Heavenly Father and that's about it.

But even now I'm being ungrateful. So. Yes. My Father in Heaven is taking care of me, I know He is. Through His strength I'll make it through. This blog is therapeutic also. That's enough for me, if just for today.